By now, most die-hard fans of horror movies have heard about THE WITCH, if not seen it. Of those fans, most have formed an opinion (even some who haven't seen it, but who are going in with preconceived notions or bias based on the perception of hype). First off, let's get it out of the way right at the top...that's not a fair way to judge a film - how many people involved with horror like the movie, or how many creative ways Stephen King found to say "it's scary". Pretty much completely irrelevant aside from marketing.
But...because this has now sorta become one of the main issues of horror over the past several years (based on the success of "art house" horror like the masterpiece The Babadook and the extremely interesting and unique It Follows), and with so many horror fans citing "It didn't live up to the hype" as a "reason" to dislike what are AT THE VERY LEAST films whose ideas and settings have not been regurgitated ad nauseum, let's just agree to disagree on that point (that is, IF we disagree...if we agree, just nod your head in satisfaction).
See, here's the thing that these folks might not have considered: there is a CHANCE that casual fans of horror will actually enjoy this film...and that's because
A) They aren't hardened to the "scares" by years of watching virtually hundreds of horror movies of all types, and
B) They likely haven't been waiting the months it took for The Witch to go from festival favorite to mainstream theater.
For people who generally or mostly enjoy films of other genres aside from horror, the pace of The Witch will not seem unusual. The time spent establishing the environment and the way the characters interact will not be all that radical. The most crucial aspect of The Witch, in my opinion, is the atmosphere and the way first time (!) filmmaker Robert Eggers allows the New England family of the 1630s to feel completely and wholly enveloped in a cocoon of claustrophobic proportions, and with no viable means to escape. That in itself is pretty impressive, in an era where having a damn cell phone in a horror movie has to be explained right away in order to allow the next events to unfold in an effective manner.
There will be a few spoilers in the coming paragraphs, so if you haven't yet seen The Witch, please bookmark this article, run to the theater, then come back and finish reading.
Done? Ok. Here goes.
Let me just be blunt: first off, you have never seen another movie quite like The Witch. Just admit it. Don't try to give a list of historical or cult inspired flicks and pretend they are like The Witch. They aren't. Not really. Much in the same way that no other film REALLY resembles The Babadook or It Follows. That does not mean you have to LIKE those films, of course, or ignore what you consider to be flaws, but let's acknowledge that these filmmakers at least tried to give us something we have never seen before. With that established (come on, stop mumbling or dreaming up a response for the comments section and roll with it here), let's explore that point a tiny bit further with a bit of a caveat: BUDGET.
The estimated production budget of The Witch is between 1 and 2 million dollars; $3.5 total. That's a lot of money to most people (aside from Donald Trump, who considers it a "small loan"), but in the world of mainstream film, that aint much. Let's look at what some comparative budgets in the horror world have given us:
THE UNBORN - $15 Million
THE FOG (2005) - $14 million
HOUSE OF WAX (2005) - $30 Million
DREAMCATCHER - $68 Million (really)
EXORCIST 2: THE HERETIC - $14 million (in 1977, no less)
You get the idea. There are dozens - DOZENS - more examples just like those. Now, I don't want to pick on those specific films, and that's not to say I didn't enjoy anything about those films (ok, except Exorcist II; even God dislikes that movie), but let's be realistic here...The Witch was made for a fraction of that, and again, even if you think you HATE the movie, its instantly more memorable than any number of these generic larger budget films. That's partially because they tried to craft a movie based on more than just effects or dimly executed jump scares with loud musical cues.
Thinking back to the very first complaint that many horror folks have leveled at this super interesting, dark folk tale, "It didn't live up to the hype," it now seems ULTRA silly, because the hype was caused by people who saw this movie in previews and festivals and couldn't believe that a movie that cost a couple million to make could be SO effective, could get SO far under their skin, that they could still be thinking about it months after their initial viewing. That's a triumph for a low budget horror film from a first time (!) feature director.
In comparison, a flat out genre phenom that crossed over is presented here for your consideration: Sharknado. That's right, the first installment of that SyFy mega-hit was made for near the same budget of The Witch. Can we acknowledge the unlikelihood that Robert Eggers was able to make a really dark, somewhat disturbing, image laden story for less than the amount of money that the ghastly CGI-informed, irrepressibly silly Sharknado cost? That's pretty crazy. If you don't believe me, give it a try yourself (that's right, I just played the "Could you make a movie better than that for that price?" card).
This is not a review of The Witch, though I suspect that at some point, I will have to delve into a much longer exploration of this bizarre film that has thoroughly intrigued me and gotten under my skin with its paranoiac themes, maybe even warranting its own volume. I watched the climactic moment of The Witch with a kind of giddy glee, a super and unexpected payoff for my patience through that seething, nightmarish ditty.
No, this is just a call to my friends and brothers-and-sisters-in-arms of horror who ceaselessly downgrade movies like The Witch, The Babadook and It Follows unfairly to reconsider before you rattle off stuff like "I believed the hype" or the even more questionable "It's not scary".
Let me ask you this, then...so what? Do horror movies really "scare" you when you've been consuming nearly every release for the past few decades? I know we all WISH that every movie had the impact of the first time we saw Halloween or A Nightmare On Elm Street, but that just ain't gonna happen...partially because that already happened, years ago when you saw those first movies.
Now, instead, its time to appreciate the creativity and cinematic triumph that some of these low budget horror directors exhibit when they try so hard to craft something of worth for us with less money than many 90 second car commercials cost. You have to put it in perspective. It's a minor MIRACLE that these movies are somehow finding their way into mainstream theaters...you should AT LEAST celebrate that fact. Look, its fair to plunk down your 8 bucks to see The Witch and then decide you didn't like the film. I have no qualms with that.
But if you're a realist, you will at least have to admit that, hey, that was one hell of a good try. Good on you, Mr. Eggers. That was a super ambitious undertaking for a couple million bucks. Or, you can just flip over on your TV remote and watch Sharknado 4, whose ad campaign lets you decide whether or not the main character of Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No lives or dies.
And if you choose that film over a shadowy, diabolical study of unhinged delusion and paranoia that takes place in inescapable thickets and groves under the watchful eye of the halcyon moon, well, not to be a snob, but I guess you sorta get what you deserve.
 |
| Wouldst thou like to live deliciously? I will guide thy hand. |
