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| Note the super smart article about the size of Donald Trump's hands. |
There's a piece running on the New York Post website by a fella who opines that Batman v Superman is just, like, WAAAAY too smart for Marvel fans. That's the ACTUAL headline (sorta). There can be no other reason to explain its crummy Rotten Tomatoes score of 29%, putting it behind The House Bunny, Donald Trump's approval rating, and season four of "Full House".
Look, this IS a ridiculous score for that film...but blaming people who paid to watch the movie for the combined ratings of a couple hundred critics is as ignorant as...as...I dunno, blaming people who paid to watch the movie for the combined ratings of a couple hundred critics. Of course, he also lists such infallible proof as "They use the word 'THE' before they say Superman!!" Whoa...MIND BLOWN.
He says that using the word "The" means ol' Big Blue is no longer our best-buddy-neighbor-help-guy, NOW, the rules have changed. NOW, he has a "complicated relationship with us mortals." This lends the film gravity, he says...never mind that Supes shacks up with a normal woman and has a GIANT STATUE commemorating our appreciation for his accomplishments in saving the world..."THE" is a GAME CHANGER.
Forget for a moment that Spider-Man (yeah, that dude from dumb ol' Marvel, who are little more than dopey jerks for sometimes adapting their comics into movies by adhering somewhat closely to the source material, which they seem to be almost not embarrassed by, unlike "Direct Competition") is OFTEN referred to as "The" Spider-Man. I mean, dude...it is IN his theme song ("Here comes THE Spider-Man...)
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No, if we didn't know Superman was NOT like us in the first Superman movies when he was reversing time to save Lois Lane and launching Kryptonian super baddies into the heavens, THIS is the moment that superheroes get a "NEW dimension". Not when Marvel had the concept of not trusting superheroes as the basis of their entire giant label crossover Civil War. Not even when Superman is called THE Superman 38 years ago in Superman: The Movie.
But we press on.
Here is my favorite line: "“Batman v Superman” may be pretentious, but it’s far more mature and ambitious than these other films, and it’s even occasionally interesting."
Wow, that is HIGH PRAISE. Quick, get that out there on the Blu-Ray insert: "Pretentious, but occasionally interesting." That's not even being a good apologist, for Clark's sake.
Further, how do intelligent people go about scientifically measuring which film is "more" ambitious than the other between such blockbusters as BvS, Avengers: Age of Ultron, with its amazing circular fight scene and an earlier scene that uses the magic of cinema to appear to roll without a cut; Guardians of the Galaxy, which attempts to tell stories about the same character on multiple planets, including earth; and Deadpool, a movie that treats its subject matter in the same manner as the comic it is adapted from, using stunningly clever narration and overt breaking of the 4th wall?
Deadpool being noted as dumb or juvenile and without ambition is pretty much a dead giveaway that the writer didn't put too much consideration into what he was writing about, aside from telling genital jokes (in the Post piece, the word "onanistic" is used as a negative description to describe the Marvel movies) or being OFFENDED by them in the Deadpool movie. Deadpool is extremely intricate from the AMAZING opening right on through, but it would take someone who knows what makes a movie ambitious to really be able to look past the content and to the CONTEXT of what the movie is trying to achieve.
Deadpool is, if nothing else (though it is a CONSIDERABLE deal more), a breakthrough for movies being able to tell their comic stories in ways that remain true to the stories, regardless of rating. If anything, DC threw a PARTY to see that Deadpool did so well at the box office, since they are always toying with the idea of making R rated films from some of their most popular comic stories.
No, BvS is apparently MORE ambitious, because it attempts to "consider the ramifications of super beings" more than most any story over the course of the nearly 80 year existence of the characters (Pssst...guess this guy, an expert on the 8 decades of BvS, has never read The Dark Knight Returns).
And that's only a comic that deals with the EXACT thing the BvS movie deals with. Marvel has pretty much based Spider-Man's angst on the notion that most people do NOT trust him, spurred on by newsman Jolly J. Jonah Jameson (MENACE). Further the X-Men are stand-ins for pretty much any type of racism or bigotry that has ever existed. Those comics and movies consider the ramifications of super beings EVERY SINGLE TIME. In fact, if the writer of that piece saw Avengers: Age of Ultron, he would have seen it dealt with RIGHT THERE; the collateral damage caused by the Avengers while they try to save the world. In short...dude. This is NOT a new concept. DC even did it before with The Watchmen (and just exactly who DOES watch them, huh??).
Being a Marvelite (AND DC fan...wrap your mind around THAT duality, NY Post), I thought about pointing out all the hilarious corn that peppers BvS throughout its runtime, but no...I'm not gonna do that. Because I LIKE the movie, for one, and for another...as stated before, the notion that Marvel fans are the reason that critics gave the film a poor score is just so, so...immature.
Consider the scores given to other DC projects as of late. The Nolan Batfilms got some great scores, even that hilariously ambitious pile of apocalypto that was The Dark Knight Rises. The Nolan films got mostly good reviews even though they were MUCH more intricate in plot and execution than the new BvS movie (which I personally enjoy more than the TDK film series). Marvel fans understood the films quite easily. They understood the BvS precursor Man of Steel well enough, since it scored higher than BvS. And did you realize that even Superman Returns notched a "fresh" rating on the apparent Marvel fan scale of RottenTomatoes.com?
Come on, man. If you HAVE to write click-bait, at least give a bother to write something less silly. I mean, yeah, you can still be as pretentious and as you wanna be, but give us an opinion piece that is "even occasionally interesting".
EXCELSIOR! ;)
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| Supes is rollin' over in his grave reading this stuff. |
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